Two-ish years ago, I was on the phone with a small business coach who specializes in marketing. I applied for her “Business Makeover Program” because as I launched Live Beyond The Mat I realized I was totally prepared and ready to work with clients but there wasn’t a line of them banging down my door. The missing piece was something called branding (“what was this branding?” I pondered) and I was in desperate need of help.

Operative word in that last sentence: Desperate.
def: having an urgent need, desire, etc.

Read the rest of the story over here where my blog is temporarily residing…

Read the rest of the story over here where my blog is temporarily residing…

 

Sometimes we get so comfortable being uncomfortable right where we are. It’s way too scary to take a risk to change things when you’ve gotten so used to how they are.

Believe me. I’ve been there. It took a virtual 90 foot crane manned by 30 huge guys to lift me out of my old career as a software developer and totally change directions to become a Wellness Coach.

Read the rest of the story over here, where my blog is relocating for now…(sorry about that!)

Keep reading over here where my blog is temporarily residing…

Sorry! My blog is currently taking up space over here…go ahead and visit while its relocating.

Just the other day, my “flying friend” Nomi and I were discussing our goals at the start of our Trapeze class. She asked me “what should my goal be for today?” Typically we both like to set a focus or goal for a particular class to improve our skills and get the most out of our lessons.

So I responded with a question, “what do you want to do today?”

She hesitated, and shyly smiled. “I want to…well, um, catch my backend straddle off the rise…but that’s not really, I mean…” Attainable. That was the word she was looking for.

So I stated it out loud right back at her nodding my head “You want to catch your backend straddle off the rise. Yes?”
“Yeah.”
And guess what. She did. Twice. Watch it here.

So if you can be brave enough to state your dreams out loud, even if they seem out of reach, you might just surprise yourself. And it always helps to have someone there there as your champion, as Nomi and I are for each other.

Watch Nomi’s Back Straddle Catch of the Rise

Do you think about things that already happened or things you fear may happen later?
Do you think about things you’ve done or things you have yet to do?
Are you constantly trying to come up with a solution to an issue that’s bothering you?
Are you putting yourself down, or thinking you’re not good enough? (Argh, that’s a dreaded one.)

What percentage of your thoughts would you say are positive and affirming? What percentage are negative and unproductive?

If you lean towards a heavier negative balance, you’re not alone. I think we, as humans, are natural problem solvers. If something isn’t going right, we try to find the answer and fix it.  Wouldn’t it be nice if the majority of your thoughts were positive?

What kind of impact do you think it has on your body when you’re constantly sending the message with your thoughts of “there’s something wrong here and I need to fix it.” Not sure? What if the message were being received externally? Imagine telling a young child all day “There’s something wrong with you.” Poor kid!

I’m here to tell you that you CAN retrain your brain.  Think positively. Focus on what went well and enjoy your moment to moment life rather than focus on fixing the less than desirable moments of the day.

Eventually I figured out that if I kept my eyes looking forward, at the walk in front of me, I never had to engage in the awkward chicken dance.  I naturally veered as I saw my obstacle pass by out of the corner of my eye.

Here’s another example.  When I’m scooting downtown in traffic and can manage to squeeze between the traffic lane and the parking lane, I HAVE to keep my eyes on the passageway.  If I for one second look at a parked car, I lose my balance and almost crash right into it. (I hope my mom doesn’t read this.)

So what’s the point?

IF YOU DON’T LOOK WHERE YOU’RE GOING, YOU’LL GO WHERE YOU’RE LOOKING.

This holds true in yoga too.  Stepping forward from downward dog to lunge? LOOK AT YOUR TARGET, the space next to your front hand, instead of the floor. This will help you get that leg up.

And what about life “off the mat”?

Are you constantly fixated on what’s wrong in your life? Do you reflect too often on what’s not working and are you obsessed with trying to fix it?  If instead you could turn your head around and look forward, up ahead at your TARGET and concentrate on trying to get there, you might find some success.

1. Identify your target, your goal, where you want to go, who you want to be.
2. Reflect on what you’re good at, what IS working, what could help you reach that goal in step 1.
3. Create baby steps to get there and take one every week.

Of course it can be beneficial to reflect on your mistakes and learn from them, but when you become fixated with what is NOT working and with what’s WRONG with you that needs fixing, you stand in your own way of progress. Plus, fixing what is wrong with you, doesn’t leave you with what you WANT, it just leaves you without the thing you didn’t.

I’ll leave you with one last story from a client of mine after she spent a fabulous week at surf camp, learning to ride the waves for the first time.

“I finally stood up and actually surfed today!  I am the last one at the camp to accomplish that but that aspect wasn’t really holding me back or stopping me from accomplishing my goal.  What was, was the fact that I was still negatively coaching myself and my instructors caught me on it today!  There were 2 things that she said today that made me realize that I need to revisit some of what we discussed because I fell back into bad habits.  1) I kept saying “don’t look down” and when they heard me, Annie said “No, tell me what you are going to do” (LOOK UP!) and then 2) she identified that I am entirely too critical of myself and that I kept focusing on the fact that I wasn’t standing up.  So she said “alright, tell me 3 things you ARE going to do” so it took me a minute but I realized what they were saying and I immediately thought back to our sessions.  Can you believe that when I started saying what I was going to do, it only took one little adjustment of my foot and sure enough, I stood up on the board!”